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Offering a bribe is just tacky, perhaps even illegal. Selling a spot in line is surely so. Get a local physician and work with them. Really should have been doing this already as good practice, but especially under these conditions. If your condition is actually a recognized risk factor they can help assure you get a shot sooner. Even the deepest 'anti-federal-bureaucracy' states are going to be implementing systems to get prioritized doses for at-risk people. Part of the problem is that desperate people sign up for every listing they can find, so those waiting lists are kind of inflated with fluff, and will move faster once things get a little more organized.
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